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The Class Toy

Friday, 18 July 2014
You can tell if your child's teacher thinks you should up your game by the frequency with which the class toy comes to stay at your house for the weekend. The familiar line of 'oh just take a few pictures of you and your child doing something fun with (insert toy's name) and write about it in the book' is usually met with a death stare from the parent in question. To which the teacher smiles back with banality while secretly thinking 'Oh yeah I've stitched you UP fool! Say no to helping at the bake sale now why don't you.'

The thing is no one wants to be the parent who fails at this and so the family excursions with the toy get ever more grandiose as the year goes on. A trip for ice-cream might just cut it in September but come April you gotta take that toy to a One Direction concert, get pictures of the toy meeting the band AND being featured in a music video in order to get any kind of class kudos for your kid. Enough is enough.

I propose we as parents put an end to this but instead of dropping the ball completely which frankly would be a bit of a let down, I propose we creatively 'off' the toy in as many unique ways as possible, with pictures. I'll admit this idea is extreme and potentially upsetting for the kids but it's also funny. It's funny as hell. I mean how many times a day do you caution your child against danger? How many times do they listen and stop? Just imagine what the book would like by the end of the year. It could be the ultimate 'why I should listen to Mummy' repository for our kids. If you want to join in use the #IKilledTeddy.

Just remember, safety first.

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